I Think I Should Dedicate A Whole Section For This!

For those of you have parents that are separated, Im pretty sure you will know exactly where im coming from when I say this. It friggin SUCKS! I mean, its good that they can bicker and fight with each other anymore but at the same time, theres almost this competition that takes place between the two: who can have their kid spend more time with them and do more for them.

Last night I was invited to a family gathering that I was not interested in going to but did simply because I knew that if I didn't go, chances were that I would hurt my mom and that I'd eventually have to hear about it later and so I went, but because I did go I wasn't able to spend time with my father, who is in rehab at the moment recovering from a hip surgery. I spend most of my days there and have barely ever skipped a day and even then I only did because I was absolutely exhausted and didnt think it would be smart to get him sick. I cant help but feel that my dad has absolutely NO regards for me but I do what I can because obviously, he loves me and he's there for me a lot more than I could ever be there for him. I tried making him understand my situation and thought he would get it, since I am very candid with him and dont have to hold back like I do with my mother (even then I dont hold back but I have to watch out HOW I say it so that I dont get her all worked up) but all he heard was "Dad I chose moms brothers over you so go to hell" and he freaked out on me. I ended up going today even though I was a bit uncomfortable knowing that there would be an awkward silence in the room but luckily for me, my sister ended up going with me and so he was in a good mood and didnt even bring it up. I think most of his frustration is from his inability to go out and enjoy the day and instead, has to spend his whole day in a god damn hospital room while we live our normal lives.

At times I feel like the moment I make enough money and can disappear, I will do so and not give a damn.